Candace Cameron Bure

“I chose to fall into a more submissive role in our relationship.” ~ Candace Cameron Bure

Candace Cameron Bure chooses not to lead

“My husband is a natural-born leader. I quickly learned that I had to find a way of honoring his take-charge personality and not get frustrated about his desire to have the final decision on just about everything. I am not a passive person, but I chose to fall into a more submissive role in our relationship because I wanted to do everything in my power to make my marriage and family work.
~ Candace Cameron Bure / Balancing It All: My Story of Juggling Priorities and Purpose

Actress Candace Cameron Bure has landed in the media limelight this week, based on comments she’s made regarding her “submissive role” to husband, NHL player Valeri Bure. Best known for her role as as D.J. Tanner on the hit television series Full House, Candace Cameron Bure co-starred on that show alongside Bob Saget and John Stamos, as well as Mary-Kate & Ashley Olsen.

The genesis of the story is in her recently released book, Balancing It All: My Story of Juggling Priorities and Purpose. In that book, the former child actress tells the story of how she strove to balance the various roles, responsibilities, and opportunities that went along with her very unique personal history.

I love that my man is a leader.
~ Candace Cameron Bure / HuffPost Live


Now, it should be understood that Bure isn’t talking BDSM styled submission, instead she’s referencing the term in a biblical sense.

The definition I’m using with the word ‘submissive’ is the biblical definition of that. So, it is meekness, it is not weakness. It is strength under control, it is bridled strength.
~ Candace Cameron Bure / HuffPost Live

I’m actually seeing this more and more these days, conservative Christians living a D/s type lifestyle without the “kink”. I also know folks living a D/s lifestyle who are all about the power exchange aspect of that lifestyle. On the surface, the two are pretty much indistinguishable.

First Peter 3:1 says, ‘In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives.’
~ Candace Cameron Bure / Christian Women Online

Ironically, my Serafina comes from a very conservative Christian background. When she was younger, Serafina absolutely despised the way she was told to be a good wife and submit to her husband, her former spouse wasn’t capable of leading. And, he wasn’t really worthy of being a leader either . . . What kind of man says he misses his mommy in the hotel on his wedding night? Seriously! It wasn’t like mom couldn’t attend the ceremony, or anything like that, he was just pathetically needy and immature.

Circumstance has now changed, submission is Serafina’s chosen path. I’m pretty sure that Serafina would follow Candace Cameron Bure in saying, “I love that my man is a leader.”


It is very difficult to have two heads of authority. It doesn’t work in military, it doesn’t work — I mean, you have one president, you know what I’m saying?”
~ Candace Cameron Bure / HuffPost Live

Candace Cameron Bure

~ Candace Cameron Bure ~
© Glenn Francis,

Now, please don’t misunderstand, I’m not saying that all men should be leaders. Obviously, Serafina’s ex is a perfect example of the non-superior male. And, it should be noted that one of my very best friends in the world, the ‘best dominant’ at Serafina’s collaring, is a woman dominant. I have great respect for her, and I hold her submissive fiance in high regard as well.

My perspective is that some folks are leaders, and some aren’t. It’s more of a personal predilection, than it is a sex role that’s been preordained by whether a person is born with a penis or not. I find forced submission in the name of God (or any other name for that matter) to be an abhorrent thing. On the other hand, I find voluntary submission to be a very beautiful and enthralling thing to witness or accept.

And, if a person actually takes the time to watch the interview, Candace Cameron Bure’s decision to defer to her husband is put into a very interesting light. She talks about the trust and faith she has in her husband, how he’s earned the respect and ‘submission’ that she gives him. She also mentions that her husband, Valeri, is very good at listening to her, and considering her input, before he makes his final decision.  Funny thing is, Candice’s description of her relationship with Valeri sounds like a good description of the dynamic between Serafina and I.

Serafina likes to use an analogy of two gears, and how they must mesh together for the whole to work. If both gears try to go in their own direction, they will be destroyed, their teeth ground off against the other.  Everyone’s bound to lock gears with their partner from time to time, but knowing who’s in charge really does make things a lot easier when exploring the joy of kink.

Serafina shows submission

Sefafina shows submission, but not the biblical kind! . . . 

News Candace Cameron Bure’s Submissive Role
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