The Joy of Kink is Live!

The Joy of Kink is Live!

Joy of Kink! It’s Here Opens Primarily Due to Sinnjara’s Technical Work

The Joy of Kink is finally open!

I’ve still got months of work there restoring old articles going back to 2011 from both and

Some will be completely rewritten, showing up at Joy of Kink completely transformed from their previous posting. Others will remain “as is”, outside of some loving restoration as they are transferred. Over time, many of the old articles will disappear from this site, redirected to the Joy of Kink.

Joy of Kink logo

Welcome to the Joy of Kink, a sex-positive website dedicated to exploring kink, BDSM, fetish, Tantra, and alternative sexuality in all its guises.

Source: Willkommen, Bienvenue, Welcome | Joy of Kink

By no means am I giving up on this domain.

This site will be all about sharing the news and stories I’m reading. I have a few other purposes in mind too. Please bear with me as we clean up all the “virtual dust” from the construction.

There’s still a long way to go in the renovations behind the scenes for Samadhi Chateau’s virtual homes, but the Joy of Kink is up and looking good…

I Accidentally Fell Into the Feeder Fetish Community

I Accidentally Fell Into the Feeder Fetish Community

I wrote a little about food play at all the way back in 2011.

While I would put all food-related fetishes into a single category together, there are actually many varied forms of “food play” …

The act of feeding and being fed elicits conversation, forges bonds, and creates community. Food is exciting. I, myself, am a cute fat girl who accidentally came into contact with my first ‘feeder’, a guy who experiences erotic pleasure from feeding.

Source: I Accidentally Fell Into the Feeder Fetish Community

I don’t have a feeder fetish. But, I do know and understand the power of feeding a kneeling submissive. I wrote a little teaser about it for Masturbation Monday over at the Joy of Kink called – The Naked Lunch.

I’m of the thought that it would be fun to write an entire series of posts about food-related fetishes.

Some, like splooshing, I’ve experienced. Others, like Nyotaimori, are still on my personal bucket-list.


My Path and Leaves of Grass | Smutober Day 5

Smutober Day 5 ~ Mastery, Walt Whitman, and Leaves of Grass

Whitman influenced me greatly. He could be called my spiritual father.

If you are an American, then Walt Whitman is your imaginative father and mother, even if, like myself, you have never composed a line of verse.

Harold Bloom

steel engraving of Walt Whitman in his 30s from the first edition of Leaves of Grass

Whitman and Mastery

I hope by now, any existing readers of Michael’s Way understand my love of quotes.

Collecting quotes from my readings has been part of my personal path to “Mastery”. How I define that word may be significantly different than the path other dominants take. And, to my mind, that’s a good thing.

There is no such thing as a “cookie cutter dominant”, we all must seek our own paths on the road to Mastery. To me, being a Master includes far more than knowing how to use a flogger or whip, learning shibari, or developing skills for other types of kinky fuckery.

Mastery is a lifelong path. It’s about learning and growing as an individual, and as a leader.

The vision I have for my own personal Mastery is to grow into a sort of leather-clad Rennaissance man, always ready with wisdom, a quote, or song to share.

If you’ve read Frank Herbert’s Dune series, picture Gurney Halleck in today’s world… (Sinnjara says I’m far more handsome than Gurney, but she’s quite prejudiced.)

Portrait of Whitman by Thomas Eakins

With that in mind, for today’s Smutober entry, I’m sharing quotes from Walt Whitman’s Leaves of Grass.

It’s a book that’s rather infamous in my mind, as a copy of the book was gifted to Monica Lewinsky by President Bill Clinton. Regardless of what you think of Clinton, like him or hate him based on his morality, there’s really no denying that the man is well educated, well spoken, and charismatic.

Leaves of Grass was part of Monica’s seduction. So, to my way of thinking, it may also prove seductive enough to provide a nice helping of food for thought for you too, my dear reader…

This is what you should do: love the earth and sun and the animals, despise riches, give alms to everyone that asks, stand up for the stupid and crazy, devote your income and labor to others, hate tyrants, argue not concerning God, have patience and indulgence toward the people, take off your hat to nothing known or unknown or to any man or number of men … re-examine all you have been told at school or church or in any book, dismiss what insults your own soul, and your very flesh shall be a great poem.

Walt Whitman

Leaves Of Grass

Quotes from Leaves of Grass

“Are you the new person drawn toward me?
To begin with, take warning – I am surely far different from what you suppose;
Do you suppose you will find in me your ideal?
Do you think it so easy to have me become your lover?
Do you think the friendship of me would be unalloy’d satisfaction?
Do you think I am trusty and faithful?
Do you see no further than this façade—this smooth and tolerant manner of me?
Do you suppose yourself advancing on real ground toward a real heroic man?
Have you no thought, O dreamer, that it may be all maya, illusion?”

Walt Whitman

I sing the body electric,
The armies of those I love engirth me and I engirth them,
They will not let me off till I go with them, respond to them,
And discorrupt them, and charge them full with the charge of the soul.

Walt Whitman

Your very flesh shall be a great poem…

Walt Whitman

Do I contradict myself? Very well, then I contradict myself, I am large, I contain multitudes.

Walt Whitman

Consulting the Cigar Flavor Wheel

almost as good as sex

I started smoking cigars sometime around five years ago.

The catalyst was a D/s cigar play demo put on by a couple, folks I consider to be dear friends.  It was a memorable night.  An evening where I picked up an enjoyable hobby with rituals easily incorporated into a BDSM lifestyle.

It was also my introduction to the “kinky kabin”.  Now, one of my favorite venues for play, it’s a remote cabin about a mile and a half hike from the nearest trailhead.  Some call it “the cabin where no one can hear you scream”, a moniker that’s almost literally true.  But, to me, it will always remain the kinky kabin, a place that’s truly near and dear to my heart.

Cigars are also near and dear to my heart these days.  Call them a guilty pleasure if you will, but do not doubt for a moment that they are a great pleasure to me.  No, it’s not quite as good as sex or BDSM play.  But, it’s not far from being a close second.

differing tobacco flavors

When considering the flavor of a cigar, there are a great number of factors that will combine to affect the smoking experience.

For starters, a vast number of different tobacco varieties are grown around the world.  Each variety has a distinctive flavor it imparts.  Some are inherently spicy or peppery, others smoke much sweeter.  There is a lot of nuances, far more than I can really describe here.  I must also admit, while I’ve studied some plant breeding, I’m relatively ignorant when it comes to tobacco strains.  But, I do know that the particular strain of tobacco used is just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to flavor.

The country/region/province/state where the tobacco is grown will be another significant factor, regardless of the strain.  Cuba is famous for cigars because of the growing conditions on the island.  Honduras, Nicaragua, the Dominican Republic, Ecuador, Sumatra, Mexico, Brazil, and the United States are the highlights on a short list of places where great cigar tobacco can be grown.  I’ve also smoked cigars that included tasty Italian and Turkish tobaccos.  Climate and soil are the keys to diverse flavors here.

Cuban Flag

Just growing and harvesting the tobacco is an art of its own.  Upper leaves (sun leaves) which absorb the greatest amount of sunlight have a significantly different flavor profile than the lower leaves (shade leaves) from the very same plant.  There are unique names for each different cutting, but that’s more specialized than I’d like to get for today’s topic.  Add to that, there’s even a particular growing technique used to grow tobacco under partial shade, creating a distinctive look and flavor of its own.

flavors, flavors, flavors – decisions, decisions, decisions

Once the tobacco is grown, the art of curing comes into play.  It is during the curing process that the different bundles of tobacco leaves are turned, graded, and sorted a number of times.  Different strains of tobacco are cured, once again, using a variety of methods.  This has another significant impact on the tobacco’s flavor.

Some premium tobaccos spend time inside oak casks and barrels during the curing process.

Others are placed inside special chambers with spices, essential oils, and floral essences, creating a somewhat controversial, but popular, form of “infused” cigar.  Some tobaccos are fermented during the curing process, once again creating flavor variety.

The variations are becoming endless, aren’t they?

Acid Kuba Kuba – an infused cigar

Once the tobacco is cured, another art form comes into play.  Cigars are rarely created with a single kind of tobacco, they are blended with a variety of different leaf.

I don’t wish to get too technical with a confusing array of cigar terms, but one or two seem necessary here.  If all the leaf is used in a cigar was grown in a single country, then the cigar is called a puro.   While puros are a common form of cigar, it’s also common to find cigars blended with tobaccos from a variety of different countries.

rolling, rolling, rolling …

Once the blend of a cigar has been decided upon, then it’s time for the cigar to move into production.  I consider the rolling of cigars to be yet another skilled art.

Cigars are constructed using filler (often themselves a blend) and a binder leaf, all artfully rolled inside an outer leaf called a wrapper.  Wrappers are the most visually appealing leaf, as they are a cigar’s window dressing.  Wrappers are often (but not always) the most dominant leaf in a cigar’s flavor profile.

The cigar’s construction is yet another factor in its ultimate flavor. Cigars are rolled into a pretty wide variety of shapes and sizes, this is called their vitola. In that way, cigars are kind of like cocks. Some are long and thin, others short and stubby. Even with the same blend, each style tastes different too.

Yes, I can guarantee that size matters.  So does shape.  (And yes, I’m talking cigars…) 

Cigar Advisor’s Flavor Wheel

Which brings me, finally, to the point behind this somewhat long-winded opus on cigar flavor.

I obviously have great affection for my cigars.  In relative terms, however, I’m still relatively inexperienced at discerning all the wonderful nuances in a cigar’s flavor.

But, I’m not a total neophyte either.  I once trained, at a 4-star restaurant, to be a chef.  I was expected to be able to detect subtle nuances in food.  You might say that I, at least, have a somewhat discerning palate.

At the same time, I am still learning.  And, that’s where a reference like Cigar Advisor’s Flavor Wheel comes into play.  It’s a great guide.  The Flavor Wheel can help me to be a more discerning cigar consumer.

Feel free to click on the image, or the link (at the bottom of the gray box) in the quote, to get a peek at the full sized flavor wheel image.  Also, know that Cigar Advisor is a wonderful reference, I look for each new article there with great anticipation.  That publication’s sponsor, Famous Smoke Shop is also a great source for quality cigars at very competitive prices.  It’s where I buy mine…

The Cigar Advisor Cigar Flavor Wheel

The cigar flavor wheel – it’s how cigar lovers talk to each other. Are you wondering how to identify and taste the different flavors in your cigar? Or maybe you’ve been reading some cigar reviews, and want to know how the writer sensed certain tastes. With a flavor wheel, anyone can get into cigar tasting, regardless of your experience level.

And that’s why we’ve created this updated cigar tasting wheel…we wanted to give everyone a way to identify and discuss the flavors found in cigars. everyone in the cigar world, from blenders to smokers, uses a flavor wheel – these words provide everybody with a common vocabulary that we can use to discuss specific qualities of the cigars we smoke. You know that a cigar tastes like more than just burning tobacco; the smoke can be characterized by notes of earth, nuts, cream and many more nuances.

How to use our Cigar Flavor Wheel

We didn’t make up these spots on our cigar flavor wheel. They’re all very real, each of them a flavor sensation that either we sensed while reviewing a cigar, or was mentioned in a review by someone whose opinion we trust.

Think of the wheel as a visual glossary of the most-often mentioned cigar flavors, organized into categories – or even more appropriately, families. each color-coded part of the wheel is loaded with words that match up with the qualities you might sense in a smoke. That way, when you try and describe the things you like about your cigar, we can understand more clearly – because we know what those flavors taste like, too.

What the Categories Mean

The primary categories of the cigar flavor wheel are at the center. From there, we break those outward into subcategories. Related categories appear side-by-side, and we’ve color coded the groupings to reflect the feel of each family: green for plants, yellow for spices, etc.

To use this flavor wheel for cigars, fire one up and start at the center – as you smoke, think about the basic flavors you’re sensing. Then you can proceed to narrow down these general observations into more specific flavors, as you move toward the outer rings of the wheel. That way, you can note which cigars have the flavors you like (or the ones that don’t), and discuss your experience with other cigar smokers.

Cigar Flavor Wheel | Famous Smoke

Note – I am not affiliated with Famous Smoke Shop or Cigar Advisor in any way.  The links I’ve provided are for my reader’s convenience only.

The Ethical Slut III Released!

Millennials are increasingly embracing non-monogamous relationships – and the 1990s guidebook that helped popularize them is getting an update…

In 1994, sexual educator Janet W. Hardy, was bedridden for a month with a bad flu that had evolved into bronchitis. She was, as she recalls, “high off my ass on Codeine cough syrup” when she caught a showing of Indecent Proposal on TV. Married couple David (Woody Harrelson) and Diana (Demi Moore) are faced with a moral dilemma when a billionaire named John (Robert Redford) offers them a million dollars in exchange for spending one night with Diana. Hardy, who is now 62, had herself been in a marriage that had ended about a decade earlier, and had not been in a monogamous relationship since. At the scene where the couple hesitates over the billionaire’s offer, Hardy wondered if she was having a fever dream.

“I was sitting there going, ‘What’s going on here?'” she tells Rolling Stone from her home in Oregon. “A million dollars and Robert Redford, and they have a problem with this? It made no sense to me. I really got it at that point, how distant I had become from mainstream sexual ethics.”

Hardy reached out to her friend and sometimes collaborator, the psychotherapist Dossie Easton to work on a book about non-monogamy. The pair had already coauthored two books on kink which were read in BDSM circles, but not much elsewhere. Both Easton and Hardy identified as queer and polyamorous, and Easton wanted to reclaim the word slut. They combined their own experiences with both casual sex and open marriages, navigating orgies and battling jealousy. In 1997, under Hardy’s own indie sex-ed publishing house Greenery Press, they published The Ethical Slut: A Guide to Infinite Sexual Possibilities. It would go on to sell 200,000 copies.

Anna Fitzpatrick

Rolling Stone, 'The Ethical Slut': Inside America's Growing Acceptance of Polyamory

Janet Hardy

Ethical Slut (the original)

I’m a proud owner of a well worn first edition of The Ethical Slut.

I purchased it on my very first visit to Washington D.C., back when I worked as a community organizer.

In the days before, I was thrilled to discover my future copy at an alternative bookstore near Du Pont Circle.  (If memory serves me correctly on the details…)  It’s not like I was going to find it at the local Barnes and Nobles here in the Bible Belt.

My purchase was made just after the book was first published.  I knew immediately it was a must have for my sexuality library.  I had already read a pre-publication blurb in a magazine called S&M Utopian Guardian, which had very much peaked my interest.

Dossie Easton

ethical sluts

The group I was with had to fly home the next day.  And, I have to admit being very excited about my new purchase.  So excited that I set aside the biography of Thomas Jefferson I’d been reading for the trip, and started my new find.

Reading amidst my co-workers, seated next to my boss, I couldn’t hide what I was reading.  I didn’t care.  I just sat there on the plane with my jaw agape reading Janet and Dossie’s masterpiece, occasionally nodding my head in agreement with the text.  I’m not sure how my seatmates felt about my choice of literature, I honestly didn’t notice.

I was already living a poly lifestyle and had been poly for about a decade.  In fact, I’d started living like an ethical slut briefly before the term polyamory was invented.  To me it was a simple concept – if a parent can love more than one child, why can’t I love more than one person too?  But in practice, well, it was sometimes a real struggle.  The Ethical Slut provided the framework I desired for making polyamory work.

It would not be an overstatement to say The Ethical Slut changed my life.

Slutting of the Ethical Kind

I also own a 2nd edition Ethical Slut.  I purchased it out of respect for Janet Hardy, I have a bit of a crush on her.  And, I wanted to keep up with new concepts in poly.  Call it continuing education if you will.

The second edition wasn’t quite life-changing like the first had been.  That would have been far too much to ask.  But, I still found it more than a little bit useful.

I even picked up a second copy of the 2nd edition for my Kindle not too long ago.  While I love the feel of a physical book in my hands, it got to be a little too much to be purchasing a new bookshelf every year for more than a decade.

After picking up The Ethical Slut II on Kindle, I planned to resell my physical copy of the 2nd edition.  Obviously, I hoped to economize on space.  It never happened.  I’m a sentimental bastard, and I just couldn’t part with the book.

Even More Ethical Slutting

Now there’s a third edition, just published.  And, I’ve already picked that one up too.  I plan to write up a review of The Ethical Slut III once I’ve had the opportunity to digest the new material.  It won’t be easy to be objective, but I doubt there’s much to be critical of anyway.

I’m looking forward to more continuing education in polyamory.

Thank you, Janet Hardy and Dossie Easton.  To be quite honest, I believe you truly changed the world with your book, The Ethical Slut.  You certainly changed mine… 

making faces

Michael Samadhi – your humble narrator – making faces

I am expressive but secretive about my emotions.

Alia Bhatt

I am told that the time is far overdue to create and post an “about” page.

That’s the post where I am supposed to distill the essence of who I am.  It’s the point where I tell my readers everything they need to know about Michael Samadhi, not to mention laying out my vision for the blog.


This isn’t going to be that post.

I’m a lot better at telling stories about my life than I am at trying to explain what I’m all about.  I’m better at talking about what’s right in front of me than I am about explaining what’s underneath it all.

Refining what I am, and my vision for this blog will have to wait for another time.  So, for today, I’ll just post two images of myself.

Of course, neither is my normal visage.  That would be too simple…

isn’t that what equality is for?

Patrick Mulcahey | Quote of the Day | 9/17/2017

It may be that for the first time, a majority of LGBT Americans — I’m talking sheer numbers now, without reference to class, race or any other factor — feel assimilated into the mainstream. Even our celebrities: Anderson Cooper, Ellen DeGeneres, Laverne Cox, RuPaul, they’re everyone else’s celebrities too. We sometimes hear older gay folk complain that millennials take equality for granted, but isn’t that what equality is for?

Patrick Mulcahey

First, Be a Human Being

go into chaos

Orsho | Quote of the Day | 9-16-2017

When you are making love don’t control. Go into uncontrol, go into chaos. It will be fearful, frightening, because it will be a kind of death. And the mind will say “Control!” And the mind will say, “Jump in and keep control, otherwise you will be lost in the abyss of it.” Don’t listen to the mind, get lost. Abandon yourself utterly and without any technique you will come to see a timeless experience. There will be no two in it: oneness. A consciousness will be there, a lucid passive consciousness will be there, you will know what is happening because you will be fully aware. But you will not be there; awareness will be there. You have to imbibe the Tantra spirit – it is not a technique to be learned.


This Very Body the Buddha, Vol. 1, Talk #8

Dreamscope Effects Tutorial (part 1)

Dreamscope Effects Demo (pt. 1)

I’ve recently taken up creating digital art from photography for this blog.  I use a good number of different image processors, too many to name them all.  For today, I’m going to focus on just one of the processors that can provide a wide variety of filters.  It’s called Dreamscope.

Anyone can try Dreamscope for free.  Just be aware, free users go to the back of the line when waiting for images to be processed.  In all honesty, that pretty much means overnight.  Submit 5 photos on Tuesday afternoon, and the finished product will show up on Wednesday morning.  Slooooow.  For $9.99 a month much quicker results are available.

The size of the free images is more than satisfactory for a lot of purposes.  Once again, paid users will get bigger images with slightly better detail.

There are many dozens of effects.  Far too many for me to always know intuitively which effect would best serve my own needs.  This demo will (hopefully) help familiarize my readers with the powerful effects that can be created with Dreamscope.  At the same time, it will be a reference for my own purposes, a sort of guide to potential effects.

I often use more than one image processor for the “art” I’m currently creating.  However, for this project, I’m simply using 4 images that came across my Tumblr feed in the last few weeks.

In addition to simply providing a demo of the different Dreamscope effects, the four pictures themselves are also somewhat varied in size and subject matter.  I hope this is effective in showing the different filter’s effects on a small variety of subject matter.

the pictures


Thick Oil Paint


Fire Prayer

Purple Dawn

RWB Cubism

Oil Pastel Portrait

Picasso I

Picasso II






Monet III