The Joy of Kink is Live!

The Joy of Kink is Live!

Joy of Kink! It’s Here Opens Primarily Due to Sinnjara’s Technical Work

The Joy of Kink is finally open!

I’ve still got months of work there restoring old articles going back to 2011 from both and

Some will be completely rewritten, showing up at Joy of Kink completely transformed from their previous posting. Others will remain “as is”, outside of some loving restoration as they are transferred. Over time, many of the old articles will disappear from this site, redirected to the Joy of Kink.

Joy of Kink logo

Welcome to the Joy of Kink, a sex-positive website dedicated to exploring kink, BDSM, fetish, Tantra, and alternative sexuality in all its guises.

Source: Willkommen, Bienvenue, Welcome | Joy of Kink

By no means am I giving up on this domain.

This site will be all about sharing the news and stories I’m reading. I have a few other purposes in mind too. Please bear with me as we clean up all the “virtual dust” from the construction.

There’s still a long way to go in the renovations behind the scenes for Samadhi Chateau’s virtual homes, but the Joy of Kink is up and looking good…

I Accidentally Fell Into the Feeder Fetish Community

I Accidentally Fell Into the Feeder Fetish Community

News link from Gizmodo / Munchies

I Accidentally Fell Into the Feeder Fetish Community

I wrote a little about food play at all the way back in 2011.

While I would put all food-related fetishes into a single group together, there are actually many varied forms of “food play” …

The act of feeding and being fed elicits conversation, forges bonds, and creates community. Food is exciting. I, myself, am a cute fat girl who accidentally came into contact with my first ‘feeder’, a guy who experiences erotic pleasure from feeding.

Source: I Accidentally Fell Into the Feeder Fetish Community

I don’t have a feeder fetish. But, I do know and understand the power of feeding a kneeling submissive. I wrote a little teaser about it for Masturbation Monday over at the Joy of Kink called – The Naked Lunch.

I’m of the thought that it would be fun to write an entire series of posts about food-related fetishes.

Some, like splooshing, I’ve experienced. Others, like Nyotaimori, are still on my personal bucket-list…

TMI Tuesday for 8-1-17 (originally August 23, 2011)

Random stuff the universe needs to know about YOU.

There was no TMI Tuesday posted for today, August 1, 2017.

I have no idea what the story is here.  I only know that I’d planned to participate this week.

As part of “curating” my past sex blogging content, I’m collecting everything here, under one roof, so to speak.

So I’ll present one of my prior TMI Tuesday efforts.  Previously posted at


1. When you go to a party, would you rather show up accidentally underdressed or overdressed?
I’d rather be overdressed than be too casual these days.

2. What is something you have won and how did you win it? (Inspired by the An Optimistic Virgin)
I won my slave’s heart! I prevailed with integrity, intellect, compassion, not to mention an overactive imagination in the bedroom, and a good measure of dominance to match her submission.

3. Do you squeeze the toothpaste from the middle, end, or top?
Bottoms up baby!

4. What is something your parents used to say to you that you promised yourself you would never say–but now you catch yourself saying frequently?
You can never go wrong by acting with class and dignity.

5. What 3 lies did you regularly tell your parents? If applicable, what 3 lies do you tell your parents now?
I never lied with regularity, not even to my parents.

6. What is something that you intended to do today but didn’t? Why not? Will you do it tomorrow?
I intended to write more on this blog, not just answer a TMI Tuesday . . . I didn’t write more because I used up the last of my energy visiting a sick parent in the Hospital. I hope to write more tomorrow, I hope to write more every day, whether I make the time and feel the inspiration is still up for grabs.

7. What is something that people do in traffic that really bothers you? (inspired by My Quest To Be A Good Girl)
I am bothered by people talking on cell phones while driving, their divided attention endangers other drivers.

8. Whose autographs have you collected? (You can stop at five, in case you’re an autograph hound or celebrity stalker).
Tony Oliva, Rod Carew, Harmon Killebrew.

Bonus: Where do you go to find solitude, tranquility or connection to a higher power?
During sacred sex – These days I find it in the bedroom when sharing sensual moments with my slave. The webs we weave (both figurative and literal) send us to powerful heights of shared passion.

Tony Oliva

TMI Tuesday blog

How I Earned Her Submission

how's that workin' for ya?

opened the window and influenza

Woke up this morning laid low by what I am guessing is a flu virus.

I have all the classic flu symptoms: fever, headache, body aches, tight chest and dry cough.

I am not sparing you, my dear reader, any of the gory details.

So, I also should mention that it feels as though a bunch of garden gnomes had a wild party in my sinuses last night.

Needless to say, they didn’t clean up after themselves.

The fever and headache left me in some kind of quasi-delirium.

I decided that as a dominant I should simply command the virus into oblivion. Will it away.

At this point, Dr. Phil appeared in my visions.

And, the good doctor asked how that was workin’ for me!

I’m sure you already know the outcome.

In fact, you are probably laughing a little at my hubris.

I’m laughing a bit at myself, so really, it’s ok to have a chuckle at this Master’s expense.

Which leads me to the real point of this morning’s short essay . . .

common mistake

One big mistake many inexperienced would be dominants make is to assume that a submissive will submit to anyone who styles themselves to be some kind of dominant or Master. They read online about individuals who have a “slave heart.”

Then they make the mistake of thinking that means the slave will automatically succumb to any dominant who crosses their path.

Adding insult to the injury, when the self-styled dominant isn’t instantly obeyed, they often lash out.  In the classic example, the would be Dom ends up saying the person who wouldn’t obey them must be a bad submissive.  Or even no kind of submissive at all.

I’ve got a bit of news for this kind of so-called dominant.  Just because you will it to be done, just because you command it be done, that doesn’t necessarily make it so.


Most submissives will respond to a random dominant’s commands about as well as the virus that’s plaguing me.

If the self-styled Dom is lucky he’ll be ignored.  If he’s not, well then I’d expect that there very well be some laughing at his expense.

Submissives really are living breathing human beings with their own beautiful minds. They are not doormats.  Nor do they respond to commands like a robot.

If they are collared or otherwise in a relationship with a dominant, it could very well be seen as an act of disobedience or disrespect to their Master/Mistress.  If you owned a slave, how would you feel if they let some other person give them commands?

the real world

While the thought of having submissives throwing themselves at your feet might be attractive to the would be dominant, that’s just fantasy fodder.

In real life, we tend to appreciate things that require an effort to achieve, so I’m afraid life would be rather boring if it took no effort at all to engage somebody’s submission.

Things that come without effort are usually considered disposable.  I’ve never had a slave who was disposable to me.  That thought is quite foreign.

Any submissive I’ve ever had obeyed me far better than any other creature on this planet (especially your run of the mill flu virus.)

That obedience is not because I am some super dominant in her eyes, but because I have earned her respect.  Her trust.  Her love.

And ultimately, that’s how I earned her submission too.

This was originally published on August 29th, 2011 – at It was published under a different title – how’s that working for ya?. This post has been extensively edited for content and style here, at 

Phthalates (part 1)

the smell is like napalm but it doesn't smell like victory

A version of this post was originally published on October 9, 2011.

A PSA (Public Sexual Announcement) by Michael Samadhi . . .

Master: Smell that? You. Smell. That?
slave: What?
Master: Phthalates, son. Nothing else in the world smells like that.
Master: I love the smell of phthalates in the morning. You know, one time we had a massive scene for 12 hours. When it was all over, I walked around. We didn’t lose one of ’em, not one stinkin’ toy or length of rope. And the smell, you know that plastic smell, the whole scene … Smelled like …
[sniffing, pondering]
Master: Victory. Someday this scene’s gonna end …
[suddenly walks off]


30th anniversary

The year 2011 marks the 30th anniversary of my first sex toy purchase.  Well, that is if you don’t count a bundle of clothesline I purchased to tie up my girlfriend when I was a senior in high school – that’s a story for another time …

Back in that day, just finding the toy was an adventure that led to a poorly painted little store in a questionable part of town.  It was a seedy dive with a cheap tiled floor (complete with chipped corners.)

Dim, flickering, fluorescent lights lit the place, poorly.  I’m guessing that was better for business, not many would wish to be recognized in the store.  It was an era of ugly sex toys.

Without fail, the store was filled with an overwhelming chemical smell.Immediately upon walking into the adult store, my senses would be assaulted by a rubbery plastic smell.

The odor seemed reminiscent of old decaying plastic cling wrap from grandma’s closet.  The atmosphere always seemed to leave me a little bit nauseous, and significantly short of breath.

On the verge of an asthma attack.  Despite the fact that I’d mostly outgrown my asthma symptoms.

I’m quite sure the shortness of breath was not caused by excitement, most of the offerings seemed a little repulsive at that time.  The nausea wasn’t caused by the dim flickering lights.

my first time

Despite all that, I do remember my first time well, quickly purchasing a modest vibrator made of a fairly pliable plastic. And, I’ll never forget the relief my lungs felt upon gasping for a few chest-fulls of fresh air upon my exit.  I can also remember that same plastic smell permeating the bedroom when I went to show my ex-wife the purchase.

At the time, I assumed that the toy’s cheap cardboard packaging had somehow absorbed the terrible plastic odor from the store. With the power of hindsight, I’m quite positive the god-awful stench inside the store was actually stink from the dozens of fake cocks and plastic vibrators that lined the shelves.

I’m now convinced that the stink I associated with those cheap plastic toys was the odor of some variety of a family of chemicals known as phthalates.


can’t you smell that smell

You need to know that phthalates (pronounced Th-allates) are in the news these days, and it’s not good news. Phthalates are being phased out of many products in the United States, Canada, and the European Union, because of some pretty serious health concerns.

It’s my understanding that Phthalates can potentially cause damage to the liver, lungs, kidneys, testes and can likely cause hormonal disruptions too.

Phthalates are a whole family of chemicals used primarily as plasticizers. They are added to plastics to increase their flexibility, transparency, and even durability. For instance, phthalates are often used to soften polyvinyl chloride (PVC).

In retrospect, it’s pretty obvious to me why a soft flexible sex toy and ancient cling wrap might smell alike.

The same chemicals were probably used to make them both flexible and silky smooth to touch.  It turns out that my lungs knew the dirty little secret of phthalates long before I was ever consciously aware of any problem with the chemical.

When we found several rolls of smelly old cling wrap at Grandma’s house after she passed away, we didn’t want the smell near our food, or even in our kitchen.  So, we threw it all away.

Knowing what I now know about the potential dangers of phthalates, it was a great decision.

protect yourself

If you have sex toys made of soft plastic or any jelly like substance, if you have toys that are more than just a few years old, you may consider throwing them all away too.

At the very least, if you can’t bring yourself to give old toys to the garbage bin, use a condom (latex condoms do NOT contain phthalates) when playing.

Master: I just want to say one word to you. Just one word.
slave: Yes, Sir.
Master: Are you listening?
slave: Yes, I am.
Master: Phthalates!

(apologies to the writers of “Apocalypse Now” and “The Graduate” as well as Robert Duvall and Dustin Hoffman- the original sources of the reworked “quotes” that began and concluded this post)

This was originally published on October 9th, 2011 – at It was published under a different title – the smell is like napalm but it doesn’t smell like victory – Phthalates pt. 1. This post has been extensively edited for content and style here, at