This entry is part 13 of 15 in the series 30 Days of Kink w/ Michael
  • Tell us about a humorous BDSM/kink experience you’ve had. If you haven’t had one, talk about aspects of kink/BDSM you find funny.

I’ve been doing this BDSM thing for a long time.  I was thinking about all that experience today, and what it adds up to . . .

I turn 51 later this year, but I tied my first girl up for sex when I was 17.  I actually think I tied a girl up for the first time at 12 years old.  But, that’s not exactly a BDSM story, it simply shows my perverted predilections at even that tender young age.

So, I was considering all those years, and at the same time Serafina and I had just traveled to visit Sinnja, staying with our love and her brood for her birthday.  That gave me opportunity for further reflection, as her house is far more crowded with people than any I ever lived in.

a unique lifetime
Growing up an only child, and then not having children of my own, has given me far different perspectives and opportunities than most.    I never have had the joys of fatherhood.  But, I’ve never had the responsibilities or obligations either.

I’m realizing more and more that I’ve ended up having a relatively unique life.  Unique like having far more opportunity for BDSM play than just about anybody who has lived with children ever could  have found.  I made the most of those opportunities too.

Now, in pondering all my unique opportunities and experiences, humorous kink experiences weren’t exactly at the top of my list.  Oh for sure, among those unique opportunities have been more than my share of humorous kink experiences.  But, comedy isn’t always the very first thing in mind when I’m in the leather and dungeon mindset.

I think it’s natural to think of “firsts”.  They tend to be memorable, even if the actual action isn’t always perfect.  At least that’s been my experience.

I also tend to remember those absolute peak moments where everything came together perfectly.  That kind of thing can be pretty rare, perhaps even more rare than a “first”.  But, I’ve got to admit, I’ve had more than my share of times where everything went perfectly and left a mind blowing scene in it’s wake.

opportunity + persistence = awesome experiences
Michael-&-Abbie-art3I think the collection of mind blowing experiences I’ve felt and shared, at least in part, are a question of opportunity.   If a golfer plays enough he’ll have a hole-in-one to his credit, the bowler a 300 game.  If a fisherman makes enough casts, everything else being equal, he’ll catch his trophy[ 2. my good friend AlphaBull landed his prize Muskie this last summer – it took thousands of casts before she arrived – but that’s how it goes – that particular sport rewards Alpha’s exacting persistence and patience.].

My primary hobby as an adult has been sex.  In the sexual realm I’ve rolled my 300 game, and shot my hole-in-one.  I’ve landed my prize trophies too.  In the past I’ve always practiced “catch and release” there . . . But, I have to say that Serafina and Sinnja are sure “keepers”.  I’m quite well satisfied with my good fortune.  And, in thinking that’s already one over the current “legal-limit”, I’m done “fishin”, at least for this lifetime.

Which brings me around, finally, to begin to relate a humorous kink experience from my past.  With more than thirty years of BDSM and kink behind me, it’s only human that I’d have more  than my share of silly and laughable moments to relate.  Perhaps the biggest issue is simply deciding which story to tell.

I’m a storyteller by nature.  I love sharing anecdotes and interesting experiences.  It’s a way of reliving my past fun, as well as remembering previous lessons too.  That’s part of my motivation in blogging.

pick just one humorous kink experience?

Michael-&-Abbie-artSo, my first instinct was to share a story from my more distant past.  Heck, I could go as far back as 1981.  I could relate how I accidentally “ruined” ketchup for my ex-wife – there were a couple of years where she wouldn’t eat ketchup at all because of a food play experiment gone wrong.  Oooops!

I’m sure lots of folks would get a kick out of hearing how I let one girl shave my legs and paint my toenails.  Ya, I let her shave my chest too.  Oh the things a 20 year old will do to get some pussy.  Perhaps that one falls more under the category of ‘personal embarrassment” than it does actual comedy.  I’ll let you, my dear reader, be the judge of that.

I could share what is now a humorous kink experience revolving around a girl tied up on the bed of my small efficiency apartment while another desperately knocked on the door wanting attention herself.  At the time, there was nothing funny about it.  But, in retrospect, I have to smile and laugh, I mean what else can you do, right?

I spent over a decade with a lady named Blissful Torment as my wife and bottom.  While laughing as a part of our sexual games wasn’t really our forte, no doubt we had our moments.  Although it was mortifying to me at the time, one particular scene with our friend Cherub stands out in my mind.

Michael-&-Abbie-art4I’d prepared a plan for a scene that included both Bliss and Cherub as my submissive, to both be restrained and teased in turn, one after the other, for a long evening of torment.  I’d also selected a series of 5 cd’s of gothic music and had them in a changer set to play songs at random from the various discs.  My “dungeon” area was lit softly with candles.  A stick of incense burned slowly in the corner.

Then, not long after the second song came on to play, the incident happened.  While a spoken word incantation to Nosferatu as the second song’s intro droned on like a dirge, Cherub and Bliss looked at each other, and both broke out spontaneously in uproarious loud laughter.

As I said, it was mortifying for me.  The scene I’d planned, the mood I’d so carefully set – gone!  Maybe it wasn’t so funny at the time, but I look back and I laugh today.  Like I said before, what else can you do?

choosing a current humorous kink experience . . . finally!

Michael-&-Abbie_FotoSketcherBut, none of those past scenarios appealed to me.  For this post, I really wanted something current.  I really desired something that included not only my Serafina, but also our new partner in love and life, Sinnja.  And, while there are plenty of moments, the joyous feelings we share in the dungeon are a big part of our mutual attraction, few of those translate well into a written anecdote.  As with so many things in life, you really needed to have been there to get the humor.

And, because blogging is such a visual medium, I really wanted to find a moment we’ve captured.  While we are prolific photographers, the last requirement really upped the ante significantly.  Humor is often spontaneous, and without a doubt random spontaneous moments are most difficult to capture on film.

Still, we are prolific enough that we do have a few humorous kink experiences captured recently.  To be honest however, Serafina already took the very best one.  Her story of being released from rope bondage on a picnic table just moments before the arrival of a park ranger – priceless!

Fortunately, I do still have a silly story, with appropriate visual.  Well the visual itself really is the story.  Obviously then, the attached images of me with a furry dinosaur is not the kind of thing I’d usually post.

I’m serious about kink and BDSM, and I’m also a sadist.  I like to create strong sensations and elicit strong feelings.  Being a a serious sadist is not only what I am, what I enjoy, it’s something I’m not shy about sharing either.  I deliberately cultivate that image.

Michael-&-Abbie-extrudeAnd the sadism is not just posturing.  The first time I played with Sinnja I was rough enough that her nipples were raw and scabbed for the better part of a week.  The next time we played the scabs opened up and I got a little blood on my hands.  She got some blood on her shirt too, that day, just a spot.  It was a detail I wasn’t totally shy about sharing with my circle of friends at a munch we attended later that day.  See what I mean about deliberately cultivating an image?

So, when Sinnja first came to visit our home, with a girl in tow that she was involved with at the time, it was rather out of character for me to pose for a picture with a stuffed animal, let alone a purple freakin’ dinosaur.  Pictures of me without my goatee are pretty rare too.

The stuffed critter was her girl’s, and to be honest I can’t remember how it ended up in my hands.  The lack of mustache and goatee were intended to be a temporary situation.  I’d wanted Sinnja to see what she was getting, see the man without the facial adornment.  If, for instance, I lost the beard because of a fire play incident gone horribly wrong, I didn’t want Sinnja to cringe at what she found exposed underneath.  She needed to at least see the bare man once.

The reason I didn’t have a beard isn’t terribly important to the story, nor is my thinking in grabbing the stuffed dino.  Sinnja’s reaction is what made the moment.

‘This I’ve got to capture!” she said, grabbing her cellphone from her purse.  Everyone roared with laughter, and I mugged for the camera to produce the image just below.

It was only a few days later that the  picture ended up featured on the opening screen of Sinnja’s cell.  Every time she opened the phone she was greeted by the purple dinosaur on my chest, alongside my bare smiling mug.  Sometimes it made her giggle.

And, in the end, that is the reason for this post.  Her giggles on opening the phone.  They touched me very deeply.  To the core.  For a woman who had an abusive background in her childhood, who still suffers a form of PTSD nightmares due to her abuse, to be able to give her that giggle . . .

Well, it’s priceless to me.

I hope this post makes you giggle too, my sweetheart, my love!

tell us about a humorous kink experience

Michael-&-Abbie

 

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